Back to life, Back to reality...

I have pretty much taken the last month off. I did not trip up, mess up, oopsy-daisy. I did not miss a step and fall face-first into a vat of ice cream, as delicious as that sounds. I, quite frankly, completely sabotaged all my months of hard work and ate crap and stopped working out. 

Sabotage. Undermining a cause. I have undermined my own cause - that of my health - over and over. And I know I am not alone. How many of you have a goal you have worked toward - months of energy and planning and buttloads of hard work - and then, for one reason or another, taken time away and completely undone all of that work? And for what?

Last week, Boot Camp Guru texted a bunch of us, asking what we felt was our biggest struggle this summer. She was donating a quarter to a local charity for every answer. I really pondered that particular query - I really could only come up with one answer, and that answer was laziness. Sheer, unadulterated, laziness. We are discouraged from using that word as a reason - you're not lazy, the laziness is just a symptom of depression, or exhaustion, or some deep down emotion you must explore. But what if laziness really is the answer? I've felt pretty freaking good over the past year, emotionally - depression is not the answer here. Sure I'm tired at 4:30 AM, who the heck isn't? But exhausted? No. I didn't feel like getting out of bed and working out - after finishing the Pig in May, I felt I needed a break. Taking a couple of days off would have been fine, but not the next two months. I didn't feel like taking the time to prepare my food for the week, cooking healthy foods. I wanted to sit up and watch television with my husband every night instead of going to bed early so I could wake up early. Chopping veggies is annoying.

I've let sheer laziness sabotage my months of boot camp, my emerging biceps, my renewed energy.

No more.

Check my sexy new Asics - out for their inaugural workout this morning.

One of my favorite new things I've tried implementing with this whole "healthier me" thing is to jump in where I am. If I eat poorly or skip a workout, get back to it next meal, or next chance to get to a workout. It eliminates the whole "I've ruined the whole thing" mentality that can completely derail a new lifestyle. 

There is something powerful about a Monday, though, isn't there?

Yesterday, as we were driving home from Chicago (another post, another time), I received a text from said guru, "See you at 5AM. No excuses." Just the kick in the rear I needed. I didn't get enough sleep - it's hard, after a month of 10PM bedtimes, to go to sleep at 8:30 (I don't think I'll have a problem today.) I got up, and sweated through a Monday boot camp. It was way hard - I could barely hold a plank for 30 seconds, and I had been up past a minute. But I'll be back tomorrow.

This week's goals:

Attend at least 3 boot camps

Log every bite on My Fitness Pal

Drink 100 oz of water each day.

If you want to give me a kick in the butt, please feel free to do so. I need all the accountability I can find. I am happy to do the same for anyone who needs it.

Next post I will share my happy vacation fun, but today I was feeling motivated and wanted to share. Happy Monday!

40!

I turned 40 this past week. A rather uneventful Monday birthday - I went to work, read all my Facebook happy birthday messages (say what you will, psychologists, about the negative effects of social media on self esteem - I never feel more popular than on Facebook on my birthday,) went out to dinner with my family. Unlike many people I know who are past the age of 30, I still love my birthday. I like to be fussed over, I love presents, and I have no problem owning my age. I have earned my crow's feet, darn it. Anyway, I may have been a bit disappointed, but I wasn't blaming anyone. My daughter plays sports, my son graduated, and I'm a busy woman.

The Girl had a softball tournament this past weekend. My dad and stepmom came to town to watch her play.

We had a nice visit. Watched some softball. It was hot, I was sweaty and dusty, and not exactly looking my best. My brother, dad, and stepmom, and I left after the first game on Saturday so we could go to a cookout at my sister's house. I was looking forward to it. She asked us to stop by her brother-in-law's firehouse to pick up some ice. I followed him down to the basement to pick up the ice - and was met by so many of the people I love yelling "surprise!"

Yay!  I love surprise parties! My mom, brother, and sister worked hard to put this together for me. Family from Columbus, my prima I adore, my A from Indiana...so many people I care about. And then, another amazing surprise...

They moved to Florida last August, and there have been times where missing them has been a physical ache in my chest. They were hiding in a hallway as I laughed and hugged, and then they jumped out and yelled surprise, and I ran and hugged, and bawled - horrible, ugly, huge tears of joy.

Once I calmed down from the surprise, I had time to talk to people and actually notice who all was there. There was a lot of food, and music, and kids running around and playing, and so many hugs. And presents! I love presents! I got liquor, and trees, and Pyrex, and hilariously inappropriate needlepoint samplers, and gift cards...and best of all, I got cards, and a journal my mother put out for people to write messages, and they were all full of love. I have never, in my life, felt so completely loved.
How lucky am I? So much work and time, all just to make me feel special.
Thank you, to all of you with anything to do with this. I truly felt special.